January is Mental Wellness Month, and also this month, it’s expected we welcome the new year with resolutions and then at least pretend to try to enact them. Resolutions can be thought of as promises to make personal change for the better, so it’s a perfect time to focus on mental well-being.
One of the biggest things we can do for ourselves is get regular exercise, right? The National Institute of Health says that just 30 minutes a day of mere walking can improve mood, reduce stress and, of course, provide a host of health benefits. Taking that walk in natural sunlight will even help us connect with that elusive unicorn known as “sleep.”
In the winter, especially, enjoying what sunlight is available is an important component of managing depression and mood swings, bipolar and otherwise.
I don’t know about you, but for me it’s so hard to get out when I’m depressed. Nice, helpful articles with bullet points generally have “Participate in favorite activities,” “Go out in nature,” and “Get enough sleep,” in them. But uh, it’s gray outside, it’s cold, I feel shitty, there’s no snow, I have to work tomorrow, everyone hates me, I hate everything, I can’t get enough sleep ’cause reasons, and, oh yeah, what “favorite activities?” Are you storming kidding me?
My modus operandi is to take a plan, any plan, and find one good excuse to jettison it so I can go sit and not write and stare at the dusty piano and feel sorry for myself.
So, in the name of self-preservation, it’s time to force myself to help myself against my will. Does this sound familiar? It’s sooooo hard! Exercise and sunlight are the topics for this Sunday, and a wan, winter sunlight it will be. How to get there:
I have learned to mechanically program my body to do the things to prepare for the activity, “just in case I change my mind.” Perform tasks, be the automaton, just like at work. Task A, B, C. Miserably put on clothes, drink coffee, eat breakfast, doggedly put on shoes and tie laces in spite of cat helping, and then … the danger point … go back to pee and look for phone.
Once past that, shove the body out of the door with will alone, and … outside. Having someone pushing helps.
I’m still depressed, though, and not having fun, because I’m depressed, and depression is tenacious as a headache. But you know what? Feeling the warmth on my face, the light on my eyelids, watching the solid tranquility of twisted junipers with the breeze whishing through them, hearing good music or clattering freight trains … I’m not enjoying it. I don’t want to be here … the energy is just soaking into the body and brain without me. The sights, sounds, and smells are ambling right in through the eyes, ears, and nose into the “animal hindbrain.” I think about that objectively, how I’m mad, but that’s not stopping the sunlight from penetrating or the images of my surroundings from imprinting themselves.
This involuntary absorption of healing influences is a thing. It will do its job. Going outside for sun and exercise does result in reduced stress, stabilized or elevated mood, increased energy, and better sleep. But yes, sometimes, it has to be forced.
Siege of the Spirit 